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Monday, August 2, 2010

Hall of Shame Gaiden: Tsukasa Himitsu

Remember Wesley a.k.a. Archangel a.k.a Light who is probably as retarded as otaku can go? Well, he's a member of this nerd club where he's actually one of the lesser beings. By lesser being I mean nobody really knows he exists. This time we feature a prominent member of their organization, the self-proclaimed ring-leader (whose leadership skills are widely contested), Tsukasa Himitsu.

Of course, that isn't his real name. In fact, Tsukasa Himitsu is his "alter ego" (no kidding). It's a female character he created who is supposed to represent him online. On forums and chatrooms he frequents, he goes not as himself but "Tsukasa Himitsu", a girl with an anime profile picture and supposedly a portrayal of his feminine side. As far as I know only perverts would pretend they're girls on the Internet, but for him it's a legit "role-playing" business.

I don't have the luxury of time to do a full feature on this lad (who is a lass online). All you have to know is he does parkour in public places, and by parkour I mean he'd jump over waist-high railings and down small steps for no apparent reason. He does this "hah!" sound similar to a super saiyan throwing an energy ball when he performs parkour, and normal people who see him do it in rather mundane places reward him with applaud and laughter.

Minus that and many other quirks (he's the type who thinks weird is cool), he says the stupidest and geekiest things ever. Let me leave you with quotes ripped off his Facebook wall. These may not be as hilarious for people who don't know what kind of person he really is, but for those who do, it's humor at its finest.

  • A mans heart is one hell of a fuck up place, with no beaten path, and no road signs.
  • Bones harden, muscles strengthen, skin gets tough, but no training will ever prepare you for "It's over". Whether you say it or not, it still hurts.
  • Its not not number of hits you dish out, but the power of one decisive strike the decides the outcome. Machine gun, or tank, which one would win?
  • If at first you don't succeed, you did it wrong.
  • Corey and Topanga broke up like 4 times before they got married... maybe things will still work out...
  • After jumping from the second floor, everything else seems easy...
  • Life. Some times you're on top, some times you're on the bottom, some times its great, some times it hurts. Yeah, Life fucks us all.
  • In life there are 3 ways to deal with issues. You can charge in head strong and break though it with pure effort. You can think about it and find a way around your problem. Or you can blow it up with C4. Only the first two are Legal, but the third is most fun.
  • Any problem can be solved with hard work, persistence, ingenuity, and the right amount of C4...
  • When things get tough, when everyone is against you, when no matter what you do it seems like there is no hope, when there's no way out... Type "Power Overwhelming"
  • NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO One manga is getting shut down
  • "I'll die for you whenever you want" OMG... Ok, so, out of context its kinda lame, but... DAMN... Marai Nikki! Go read on 1000manga
  • Even if the sky should fall, so long as there is hope, I shall eat Hamburgers!!!!
  • Manual Bullet Time is SEXY!
  • If form had meaning then equivalent trade would mean nothing. Yes, your form has no meaning, its whats inside that matters. What you're made of, not your shape. Carbon, water, salt, iodine, potassium...
  • Tsukasa has eaten spoiled palabok!! Roll D20 for composure... FAIL T.T
  • OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!! BAKUMAN!!!! RAWR NEED MOAR!!!!
  • Woot! New PC! Can't wait to finish setting it up so I can SERIOUSLY test it out
  • O.o installing a new motherboard has more twists and turns than I expected... *Preps stuff to go back to that comp shop...*